Today I did my wife’s job. I can’t remember feeling this tired since I worked three jobs, all in restaurants, all in one day, in high school. And I even got pizza for dinner. I just looked at the clock and it was only nine. Nine?*
So the best thing I read today was that the largest member of the deer family is a moose whose shoulder height is a good two or three feet higher than my head, and in the half of whose rack I could bathe my toddler. I was treated to a life-size representation (stuffed carcass?) at the National Museum of Natural History today. Then I took the kids out onto the Mall to run around in the freezing wind. If you’ve ever been to DC, you’ll know how windy the National Mall is.
The moose singlehandedly makes Alaska worth visiting. “What would you do if you were walking down the street and you saw a giant moose walking towards you?” I asked my son as we stood reading the little placard and looking up at the beast.
“I’d climb up onto its back and ride it,” was the reply after about 0.1 seconds of deliberation.
“What?” I asked incredulously. “How would you get onto it?”
“I’d just”—he started to pantomime, his hands and feet pumping up and down where he stood—“climb up one of his legs and up onto his back.”
*Apparently, my wife does this every day. Raising the kids I mean. I’m going to have to look into this.